If you’re looking at this book something has gone wrong in your life. When a relationship is going well, the temptation is to take love for granted and not ask too many questions – for fear of somehow destroying the magic. No wonder, “what is love?” is today’s most-Googled question.

I have thirty years as a marital therapist dealing with this very question and have answers that will turn round your relationship, help you understand what went wrong or to find love.

How the book works

I’ve gathered together fifty dilemmas about love from people just like you. In each one, I give a detailed answer and pull out something the illuminates what makes love tick. At the end of the book, I pull together the thoughts of scientists, philosophers and poets to help you understand love better and explain how to use that knowledge for a happier and more loving future.

Sections include

• Doubts about being in love
• I love you but I’m not in love with you
• The spark went out
• Making amends
• Love after the affair

How to use the book

It can be used for personal development and to check if you have swallowed whole some of the myths about love which are making love harder in the real world. However, I’ve had couples who have used the book to talk about their relationship together without going over the same old ground. They have taken one of the letters, read it aloud and then take turns to give advice.

Afterwards, they discuss their replies (especially what surprised them about each other’s thoughts) and read out my reply. In this way, they have taken a step back, talked about difficult topics but stopped everything from being too personal.